The Domestic Anti-Diva

Finally. I think I am adequately medicated. Or at least close to it.

I have two conditions that require ongoing medication: an autoimmune thyroid disorder called Hashimoto’s, and depression. To make things more interesting, the thyroid disorder can cause depression and can also make antidepressants not work so well. How’s that for fun?

I’ve been feeling like total crap for, oh, I’d say… YEARS. The last six months to year have been especially bad and getting worse all the time. Depressed, tired, stupid… oh yes, I forgot to mention, Hashimoto’s can also make you stupid. It’s generally called brain fog (by those who have it) and it feels kind of like someone took out my brain and replaced it with oatmeal. Of course, depression can have the same kind of symptoms. So figuring out which part of me is out-of-whack can be quite a challenge. In the past, doctors have tried changing my antidepressants when things have gotten bad, but it generally didn’t help much.

But we’ve finally made some headway. Almost a year ago, one of my doctors found some lumps in my thyroid. A few tests showed that they’re probably nothing (just another fun side effect of Hashimoto’s), but got me seeing an endocrinologist for the first time in years. And they’ve been nudging my thyroid meds up for over six months now, to no effect… until the last nudge. Finally, some relief!

I no longer feel the need to sleep over nine hours each and every night. I’m not exploding at my kids nearly as often as I used to. And, joy of joys, my brain is functioning! I can actually concentrate on a task for more than 15 minutes. I am able to keep my kitchen counters cleared off and things put away (not that I always do, but I had become pretty much incapable of it before). There are still ups and downs, but my bad days now are like my good days were before, and my good days now are like A NORMAL PERSON.

Since I’m still having some bad days, I’m really hoping that my doctor will nudge those meds up a little more the next time I go in. That’s in a couple of weeks. But in the meantime I’m just rejoicing in feeling human.